Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Toby Kieth and Ricardo Montebon agree...

That this country is a pretty damned cool place to be...Wow, that was like some nightmarishly bad white Hip-Hop right there. Not any worse than Kid Rock or say, Snow (who, of course, is a Kannuck) mind you, but pitiful none the less.

I also think that Kerry King might agree, between serenades to dead bodies, as well. Come to think of it, so might conservative talk radio host Alice Cooper. Zack De La Rocha, not so much. I'll leave that self-conscious revolutionary as the only hater I mention today as it is not very difficult to find haters of us in the world right now. Really, I just saw a guy outside of my window who bares more than a passing resemblance to De La Rocha, Bob Marley wannabe all, and I decided to just type it. That charlatan and Tom Morrelo squeezed as much life as humanly possible out of that one riff (you know the one) with only slight variations. Don't get me wrong, that one riff was wicked bad-ass, but there's only so much you can do with the afore mentioned one riff, trouncing about being Marxist revolutionaries, while at the same time being masters of hyper-capitalism, replete with full-line merchandising, marketing campaigns and millions of bux. The only thing separating them from N'Sinc was that Rage failed to make a Happy Meal box. That is also to say nothing of Zach's simplistic lyrical flow and unpleasing nasal delivery. Morello is the real tragedy here, as he has no excuse for not being "the great modern guitarist". RAGE, YOUR DEAD TO ME!

But I digress: Gary Oldman is a non-American who might dig this place a bit. So is Christopher Hitchens. In fact, despite his overall crappy domestic policy, Tony Blair has been a pimp for us evil Americans for some time. And god help Britain without him, judging by the early performance of his successor.

Me? I'd be dishonest if I didn't declare myself among those who vilified this incredible country until about 10:30 Am on 9/11/01. This is the way things shook down for me: it took the proletariat only about three days to form its preferred narrative, which we are all familiar with, and it caused a deep gagging reaction within my belly. I knew what they said was an outright lie and that caused me to do an internal review of almost all the information I had digested as an adult. The ultimate irony became clear: here I was, a relatively coddled clown who had lived an overall easy life with all the opportunity in the world before me, could only blame America for the "cruelty" of life.

It's clear to me, after my sixth year of patriotism, that I was dead wrong on all that. In reality America is the birthplace of all the pet projects I had latched on to. The conservation movement? Check. Civil rights? Check. Jazz music? Check. The A Team? Check. And I can't wait to see what else we come up with.

Update: Hitchens is a recent citizen. Welcome aboard, you cheeky patriot.

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