Tuesday, August 30, 2005

The Great Wall

Hadrian had one, the Chinese had one, let’s build one! Let’s build a huge-ass wall! Our border with Mexico is as leaky as TomAy on the Terror Ride. Let’s patch the sucker up! Let’s build a huge-ass wall! Rivers and barbed wire do nothing to deter the herds of illegal aliens (er, Undocumented-Americans) stampeding over our border every year. The border patrol is overwhelmed. Let’s build a huge ass wall!

Here’s the President’s response to the ongoing illegal immigration crisis (as reported in the Washington Times):

President Bush yesterday told a crowd of supporters in Arizona that "we have an obligation to enforce the borders," but did not mention his guest-worker proposal that would allow millions of illegal aliens to stay in the United States.

Rocks would have been thrown had he mentioned the guest-worker proposal.

"I understand it's putting a strain on your resources," the president said during a stop in Phoenix to discuss Medicare. "We know that. I don't know if you know this or not, but hundreds of thousands of people have been detained, trying to illegally cross into Arizona.”

Hundreds of thousands are detained, MILLIONS are not. Good job Mr. President!

"In other words, what I'm telling you is, there's a lot of people working hard to get the job done, but there is more we can do," he said.

There IS more we can do, WE CAN BUILD A HUGE-ASS WALL!

Mr. Bush vowed that the federal government would work closely with state governments to tackle the problem of illegal immigration.

That’s code talk for “I ain’t gonna do jack-crap about it.”

"That's the most effective way to do things, is to work with the state and local authorities. There are more resources that will be available; we'll have more folks on the border; there will be more detention space to make sure that those who are stopped trying to illegally enter our country are able to be detained."

Did you notice the problem with the President’s response? It didn’t involve building a huge-ass wall! Congress is blowing $286 billion on its ludicrous highway bill. For a fraction of that amount we can build a beautiful 2,000 mile long twenty-foot-high concrete wall with broken glass on top (a la Israel). In all seriousness, I say we do it.

To paraphrase the famous speech Ronald Reagan gave at the Brandenburg Gate:

Come here to this border! Mr. Bush, close this gate! Mr. Bush, build up this huge-ass wall!

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