Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Down Syndrome and GI joes...

is apparently what the brave resistance has been reduced to in Iraq. First, they send some poor kid with Down Syndrome to slaughter, by proxy, their daily innocents. Then they kidnap a helpless GI Joe from his detail at the Baghdad Toys'r'Us and parade him in front of all the world (the GI joe could be heard begging for his life and condemning the Bush administration's policies in Iraq).

Meanwhile, Gargamel of the Smurfs released an audio tape urging all of Islam to take up arms against the infidels, including Heman, the Thundercats, Voltron, and in what some expert analysts are calling highly out of character, My Little Pony. Mr. T could not be reached for comment, but in a press conference from his ranch in Texas, Optimus Prime stated "Gargamel and his cat Azriel are doomed, for freedom is on the march and soon his plan of slaughtering all of Hasbro will go the way of that stupid sit-com about a whacky robotic daughter".

Question: at what point do we declare "the resistance", as Thomas would say, D.A.F. (Dead as Fuck)?

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